And you will live in my memories, forever more i swear.♥

profile entries tagboard links

♥HELL-OH. I think nailing jelly to the wall is easier than finding a good man!
Im out of this world, goofy and understated.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
You make me happy, when skies are grey.
You'll never know how, how much i love you.
Please dont take my sunshine away.

Its just me♥

Dawn Suwanie.
Thirtieth May would be why.
Hey Monday, We The Kings, Ne-yo, Fall out boy, Nickelback, Lifehouse, Every Avenue & such, they rock!
Im melancholic, not emotional but sentimental and soft at heart.
Im very very very very insecure.
I have the sweetest friends and the wildest imagination.
I dont forget anyone easily, so you'll always be a part of me.
I am me, and i will always be.
Jellybeans and plastichearts remind me of you. ♥

Your typewriter♥

Wednesday, April 29, 2009 @ 8:00 PM

And and and and POPEYE THE SAILOR MAN, TOOT TOOT, He lives in a garbage can, Toot toot.
Then i forgot. Heh! Well, today was a averagely odd day, i guess. Haha! With the exams,
What not weird, right? Haha. Basically, what Ms Aljunied said yesterday came TRUE.
Damn her words. She said yesterday: Tomorrow, Suwanie might just find the questions for
essay unappealing and end up not writing as well as she can.
Erm. Darling Ms Aljunied, it really happened. My reaction to the essay questions were, WTH?!
Yea. Thanks, Mrs Wong who set the paper, you're such a sweetpea. -.- And the passage was..
Atrocious. Im telling you, i will go to China right now and scream in their faces if i could! The passage was undoable!
Its unhumane to give fresh sec3's such a ridiculously challenging paper, in the aspect of vocabulary especially!
Who the hell knows whats PERENNIAL when you're freaking fifteen years old! And why do i care about China's economy?!
My gosh, set a smarter paper will you? *Smacks* Okay, im done ranting. [: And Cartel with the dears as usual.
And so on and so forth and yadda and yadda. Oh and i just realized something which i just totally forgot. :/
Oh heres whats perennial.
–adjective
1. lasting for an indefinitely long time; enduring: her perennial beauty.
2. (of plants) having a life cycle lasting more than two years.
3. lasting or continuing throughout the entire year, as a stream.
4. perpetual; everlasting; continuing; recurrent.
–noun
5. a perennial plant: Daffodils and tulips are perennials.
6. something that is continuing or recurrent.
That was simply out of random curiousity. :D I have nothing interesting to post about today. D: Im a boring person.
Ah, i just remembered. I realized today that i keep shunning away from myself, from reality, from speaking out.
Does anyone have any idea how to say stuff thats in your head verbally? Gosh, it annoys me sometimes.
I seem so lively and.. i dont know, in the virtual world, i can speak with proper english and say what im thinking..
Whereas when it comes to reality.. Especially one to one situations, my mouth fails me and i cant even say the right things.
Thank goodness i live in the 21st Century, not 18th Century London or something.. I would probably die. :/
Get killed for keeping silent or some shit, haha. Ah sigh. Sometimes i just wish i could be straightfoward..
Even in the virtual world i hide a kabizillion things i wanna say. Its like theres this part of me thats just.. there.
And its just waiting to be heard.. But im like, preventing it from being heard. Theres this like, whole part of me people dont know.
And i just wish i could find someone who saw beyond me, who could see that part of me no one knows.
Who could see that underneath all my sarcasm and brave words, through all the nonchalance.. Theres the real me.
Ah gosh.. Really hate this feeling. Really hate feeling like this too. I feel like a horrible person. ]:
I wanna migrate, i wanna start afresh.. I wanna go to a place where no one knows me and everyone gives me a clean slate to start with.
No matter how much people you know say they're willing to give you a clean slate, the impression you have made on them doesnt change.
That impression causes them to think of you the same way as always and you dont have a chance to change at all.
And what with just having lost my best friend. Damn, i really need to pull through this phase of life.
And trust me, im almost there. Just not there yet. Sigh, i cant even find the strength to study right now.
I wanna spend my life reading, is that okay? ): At least i get to live in someone else's world for awhile, sigh.

I still believe in every word you said, in every kiss you gave.

As i muttered those three words, i knew it would be forever til i forgot.

Even a walk in the desert couldnt drain the flowing love i have for you.

Its alright if you're gone, alright if you're not mine.

Your broken promises and soulful kisses, they might be gone.

But you will be alive in my memories; as alive as the very last time i saw you.Y

Monday, April 27, 2009 @ 8:03 PM

I still wake up everyday, get dressed.. And think of how much i miss you.
I dont care what they say! Haha. Im thinking of perspectives right now.. And whats your perspective about perspectives?
I've been seeing from many different points of views recently, due to the break up, haha. Interesting huh?
Interesting how people can 'judge' someone through another because of something that has happened.
I think the human race is really cool! I so wanna learn Psychology or something, maybe i'll be a therapist and RAPE YOU! :D
Anyway, i think some of the views i've heard are right.. Like, a guy should always put his girl at the top of his prorities.
Dufus boys, girls need to know that they matter to you. Girls need to know that they're practically your life,
The way you love them matters alot to them. You taking time to understand them and understanding them,
It makes their hearts race with adrenaline. And once they fall for you, i swear, its the sweetest thing ever.
You nincompoops just dont know how to cherish girls. Likewise for girls, i just think we're a affectionate gender, [:
We wanna spend all the time in the world with him.. Sometimes, we're just ignorant of the mayhem, the crisis.
When a girl loves, she loves true. She just wants to feel secure, to feel like she's someone's everything.
She wants to feel loved and cherished, and to know that she means that world to someone, she smiles even in her sleep.
Girls are simple, actually. They know what they want, ask any girl. Trust me, they know, deep down they know.
Guys on the other hand are weird creatures. Sometimes, they want this.. And others, they want that.
They claim to need certain things but arent both genders human? Sexist rights, huh. No sexism here! Haha, just..
A point of view, [: Anyway, to be fair, girls would be nothing without boys and boys, LOSERS without girls.
So we all learn something from each other, right? Fair enough. At least boys kill those nasty creepy crawlies for us, :D
Sigh, boys are horrible aliens from the planet of Jerk [ No errors here. I meant it like that. ] and girls, the lovely,
Blue-green planet called Earth. So we're normal, and boys just plain abnormal. Haha!
Makes me wonder.. Why do girls always have to be the ones left crying and in pain, whereas the guys get what they want?
Well, in most songs.. its the other way round.. But in the real world, its this way. And i find it quite quite true.
Guys can come and go so easily, finding someone new to love every single day even. And girls, just..
The hurt and love lasts forever. Ask a girl who's had her heart broken because of a boy she really really loved.
Ask her if it hurts again, ten years later, and she'll still say yea, it hurts. No doubt, a lil less, but it still hurts.
Ask a guy who's been hurt. Ask him if it hurts five years later, he'll say, whats there to be hurt about?
Just chills me to the bone, thinking that love is a game for guys. Cant trifle with love, one day, you're gonna regret.
You're gonna regret losing that girl who loved you like no one else. You're gonna regret not cherishing that sweetheart who knew you inside out.
You're gonna regret breaking the heart of the girl who made you breakfast, that girl who waited in the rain.
You're gonna regret that girl who sacrificed her heart to see your sexy teeth. [ Im being hilarious NOW?! Silly. ]
And when girls screw up, they just dont see it. Go to hell, seriously. Its so damn tough just to love someone.
Why do people still fall into this bottomless pit called romance? Why do people allow themselves to be vulnerable?
Sometimes, you give all of you. And down you go; crashing, tumbling, and finally burning. How silly can we get?
AND. We always tend to assume, teenagers are so childish nowadays as well. You're called a teen for a reason.
Assume: Making an ass out of you and me. Sigh, i should stop thinking so much. And practice what i preach.
No matter how much it hurts, i promise i will press on. I promise to be a better Dawn, a better person.
Oh and by the way, i dont believe you can only find fulfilling days in church. [: I have found my fulfilling days.
Thats all for today.

And even if i cried a thousand tears tonight, would you come back to me?

And even if i walked out on water, would you come out to sea?

Now i cant spend my life standing by, 'cause even when i miss you, you're not missing me.

Its funny how my heart just wont let it go, i just dont understand.

Its crazy how the pain seems to overflow, the memories of you here with me by my side.

I cant deny that you are the love, the love of my life.

Dearest you, will you rewrite this story with me? Y

Prettty damn right,

I think many of my friends are right. You put yourself above me. They call you a jerk, i redeem you. Is it worth?

Sunday, April 26, 2009 @ 6:50 PM

Let the crazy Dawn take over for now, i promise i will smile genuine again.
A brief update. I cant stop talking in a British accent because of my dear girl Sara!
I have REDPACKET MOOLAH! And im so happy about it cause im broke, ):
And i have a great time with my classmates, i really love 3e5 to teensy bits, you're lovely, (:
Thats about it. I just came to realize i lead a very very blessed life, i never saw it.
How blind can i get, i wonder sometimes. Well, my space my thoughts, dont like? Go.
Anyway, yes i really do lead a very blessed life. Although i suffer much pain, still.
But life's a bitch, just gotta look on the other side of things, mostly.
I have the loveliest class which is so enjoyable you couldnt ask for more, truly deeply.
I also have the sweetest, dearest friends who are always always there for me, telling me what to do,
What not to do. Waking me up, scolding people i love! HAHA. They're just awesome beyond words.
I always happen to scrape through my school years without a worry, im always sitting on the fence, yet, not falling.
Despite my family being in ruins, the little pieces are still alive and kicking, quite happily i must say.
I also happen to have great teachers who're like friends and who see behind my poker face, isnt that cool?
I have everything i need and more that sometimes, its obscene. Im not deprived of any materialistic stuff.
And lastly, i had my miracle, a boy who taught me how to love, how to be myself, to love myself, to hang on tight. He even taught me how to speak well, taught me how to speak up for myself, even taught me little things about life.
He taught me how to be open, how to have courage, how to say things when i need to, how to let loose of reigns.
He taught me how to live. And though i've lost him, and he might never know this. I'll always remember him by.
I'll always remember the miracle love i experienced, i'll always cherish our memories, cherish every bit of us.
I'll swear to remember only the good and not the bad. I'll always remember what he taught me, what he said.
Yea, so i lead a sweet life after all right? Hurts and pains dont really matter anymore, they will always sting but..
I'll always have nice things to think about? Even my lovely Master Wugui listens to me. (: Its a soft toy, btw. Ha.
Yea, this is what happened today morning. I woke up and asked Master Wugui, do you miss him?
I told Master Wugui i missed him ( Not Master Wugui. -.- ) bad.. And other stuff. Heh. And Master Wugui just.. Smiled at me. [: Master Wugui rocks! She's ( Dont ask why Master if she's a she. ) a lovely lovely companion.
Well, i should stop letting the sting affect me.. I dont know how long i'll wait this time,
Sigh. Two words, screw it. [: Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox, me.

I wish you'd unclench your fists, and unpack your suitcase.

Lately there's been too much of this, dont think its too late.

Now the story's played out like this, just like a paperback novel.

Lets rewrite an ending that fits, instead of a hollywood horror.

Dearest you, will you rewrite this story with me?Y

Thursday, April 23, 2009 @ 10:08 PM

Break my heart and walk away. Thats what you did.
Dawn, WHY ARE YOU IN SUCH A PITIFUL STATE WHEN HE DOESNT GIVE A DAMN.

@ 8:48 PM

Im feeling extremely horrible right now, it hurts. Into my soul, penatrates my heart again and again.
And the worst part is, i keep thinking how much i've changed. I feel very morally not right.
I stress about being morally right, or i used to. I feel like i've lost my moral soundness.
Im not doing people justice now, and my words are so careless. And im not practicing what i preach.
My midyears are next week. To hell with it man, i want to score but im having huge doubts.
I've lost my strongest pillar of strength, lost my strength, my courage, my morality, my rationality.
Lost my joy, my genuinity, my love for life and my love for romance. I detest romance. I detest romance so bad.
I finally remember why i used kidsandromance as my blog address. It was purely sarcasm, it was the 'tsktsk,
Kids and romance.' And i fell into the trap of romance. How silly can i get. Why is trust always taken advantage of?
God, i really cannot stand this pain. I feel like im complaining alot. No more texting to disturb others from today.
I am facing this alone. I gotta learn to not affect others with my crap. I cry too much, Adha once said. God, that hurt.
Its mastering the art of pretending. For now, i will rant on my own space as i like because its my space.
And i keep thinking about the things we could've done together, things we were supposed to do. Crap, man.
I cant stop thinking of you, and i bet you've forgotten me already. Dawn, why're you so damn naive? Gawd.
I feel like crap, in a trikazillion little pieces. It might take me a milennium to get over it this time round.
Damn. I know alot of people are probably quite disappointed in me right now. Im supposed to be better then this.
Arent i? I wont say im silly for any decisions i made this year, so far. I might choose to continue believing in everything happens for a reason.
I have to stay true to my words, be a lady of my words. More importantly, on a happier note (its been awhile.)
I accomplished the mission i always wanted to accomplish for the people i love, Mission Your Smile.
I always wanted to make the person i love happy, even if it takes me all the pain in the world. And i never did it.
Despite believing and trying to do it for years, i've failed time and time again. But this time, i think..
I think i finally succeeded. It used to be them leaving, and both leaving with hearts either broken or not happy.
I never let someone leave me and be happier in a short while, i tend to hold them back alot, im a loser, so there.
But i think i finally made someone's life simpler and happier.. Less complicated. And the best part is,
It fulfilled both requirements of my belief. The you-happier part and the all the pain in the world part.
Not so great for me, but great for you. I rant about how much i need you back, how much it hurts and all that.
No doubt, its true. But i just have to keep true to my words and say you being happy, im content.
Gonna have to live with the pain for awhile now. These bleeding wounds gonna scar bad, lets just say..
For now, i wish i could rewind time. I just realized im making no sense, well to me i am, sigh.

All those lyrics, all those songs.

They prove to me how much i love you,

How upset and broken i am.

But will you ever know? And will you ever heal me like you did?

I just wanna love you again.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009 @ 8:18 PM

You taught me how to love, you showed me who i was.
Love made me say things i would have never said in a lifetime.
Yet, your very words were the very thing which took my life.
I cant breathe. These words keep replaying.. On and on and on.
I love you, very much.

@ 6:28 PM

I can only fake a smile and cover my tears with laughs.
I will not deny that every minute, it breaks me a little bit more,
That every second, i feel unbearable pain and think of the worst.
I will not deny the fact suicide is the only way out of this brokeness.
The fact that once this is taken away, my heart is left to die.
Ang Qiyin once read my palm and said i was fated to have many short relationships.
I dont wanna believe in that, i shouldnt anyway. Though i have to say im quite a failure.
Well, this is for the square orange i will always love:
It was eight more days til the thirtieth, and in the blink of an eye, its over. Just like that.
I still cant face it, i still cant stop the tears from falling, the tears still well up every second.
But i have to be true to my words right? Loving is about wanting the person to be happy.
And at three am last night, you seemed happier already. You asked me to just close my eyes and think of you.
I did, and i cried. But you're happier, i guess, and thats good enough for me. I still remember each moment,
Every day and all those times with you. When we were simpler, when the love was simpler. The crazy straw hearts..
The Flyer, all those movies, those crazy long walks around town, the long and short bus rides, Clarke Quay..
The random conversations, the serious ones, the sweet ones, the tearful ones, the painful ones and all.
The notepads, the emails, the texts that i will always keep. Did 'us' mean nothing to you at all?
There were many things you said, which it will take me eternity to forget, when you might'nt even remember.
The pain pierces through my heart, surges through my veins and crushes my mind every single minute without you.
You will probably forget me soon, and i dont even know the possiblity of another chance, another us.
We dont cross paths, we dont see each other at all. You have your freedom now, you have your life now.
You have all the time in the world now.. And whatever condition you're dealing with now. You have you now.
Maybe for the first time, i have to say its my loss. They all say stay strong, i promise you im trying.
Im trying to prove to you that i am strong and i can live without you. I dont think im very good at it.
I promise i'll get over you, give me another year or so. I just wish this had'nt happened, but its too late for that now.
Right now, its just you and me. No more us. We could have been, should have been, would have been.
But could not be. Surprisingly, despite you changing and leaving like all the rest before my very eyes,
I still trust you, and i still have hope. False hopes? Only you know. It doesnt seem to hurt you the very least.
I doubt i'll find someone who knows me like you do, someone who might love me the way you might've loved me.
But i dont think you're here to be my everything anymore. I'll still be here, waiting.. Trying to move on but failing.
Whats in your mind is beyond my comprehension. For now, i just dont want to lose a friend.
I need your assurance for this decision. Relationships crash and burn, but true friendships dont. Thats something i would like now..

Dying inside cause i cant stand it, make or break up i cant take this madness.

We dont even really know why, all i know is baby i try and try so hard to keep our love alive.

If you dont know me at this point i highly doubt you ever will,

I really need you to give me that unconditional love i used to feel.

And i know that we said let go but i keep hanging on. Inside i know its over, you're really gone.

Its killing me cause there aint nothing that i can do, baby, i stay in love with you.

And i keep on telling myself that one day you'll come back around.

And i try to front like 'oh well' each time you let me down.

See i cant get over you now no matter what i do.

It cuts so deep, it hurts into my soul, my friends tell me, i aint the same no more.

We still need each other when we stumble at fall, how we gonna act like what we had aint nothing at all.

Sunday, April 19, 2009 @ 10:00 PM

Why do people like to pick up the pieces of me, just to shatter them again?
Im tired. You guys ask me to be strong, i cannot. Im sorry. I cant find anymore strength.
I've been smiling, pretending like i dont give a damn. Inside, its piercing, its penetrating, its devastating.
I can no longer find the strength to hold the weight of my mistakes, my eyes are tired of tears.
My heart tired of daggers, of being dropped on the ground over and over again, shattering.
You guys say the people i love just dont see how good i am, just dont treasure me.
If only that were true. Maybe its my fault, maybe its just me. I just screw things up, cause im just an idiot.
Cause i let people in, trust them with my heart, and the just screw me up from the inside.
I try so hard to keep people by my side, to laugh and to be there for people. Doesnt work.
Whats wrong with me? Am i fated to only short-lasting things? Why cant i have something that lasts?
Why cant i cant trust that lasts? Love that lasts? Happiness that lasts. WHY!
Do you even understand how it hurts me? Do you even see that im trying hard not to cry?
Do you even see how much i care for you? Do You Even See Why?
I never break my promises. I never intentionally hurt you. I never stopped trying.
My question is, have you tried like i have?

I. Want. To. Give. Up.

@ 9:14 PM

Cant forget to breathe slow, count from one to ten with my eyes closed. ]:
Dumb chain text, doesnt work. Its called being gullible if you believe in such texts. ):
Alright, yesterday was a awesome day. Met Jieyun, Emyi and Binhui at Bugis,
We shopped, but barely bought anything! And it was over 30 degrees, god.
After that met Adha and watched Knowing, its a good movie! Demanding asshole chose right. :x
Oh, forgot. Lester came yesterday, when i was with the girls. He was so cute! Gosh, haha. Funny duddy. Heh.
And i also realize Singapore is a boring place to shop, after shopping for two days, i bought two things, pathetic!

Met Kau today and went K, yadda yadda yadda. Yeaa, whatever it is. So super sleepy and tired right now
Oh! I forgot a very important day, COMMENDATION DAY. It was so awesome! Not Commendation itself.
I was a nervous wreck, haha. But well, the after 'party' was PERFECT. Everyone looked so good, the teachers.
And everyone was in a great mood. I love Mr Goh! He's so..debonair, so caring, so loving. God, im gonna fall for him. HAHA.
Yea, that day was awesome. Haha. Yesterday was awesome too.. But todays a little shitty. Guess shit happens huh.
Im so tired of thinking so much im not gonna think today. Im just gonna take it all it and be happy-go-lucky.
Sigh, i've changed alot. Wish things werent made so complicated when they're so simple, sigh.

No, please. No.

Thursday, April 16, 2009 @ 7:41 PM

LINKS HAVE BEEN ADDED. Request to be linked.
Popeye the sailorman! Poop poop! Im very disgusted, annoyed and irritated now. Very.
There are alot of those stupid flies or male ants flying around my lights, dropping on
MY LAPTOP! Yuck. And they wont go away. Still have like four, irritatingly gross!
Ergh, i shall IGNORE. Something funny happened today, but i forgot what. >:[ Heh.
Well, today was basically a crappy start, a chilled yet sparky morning, a horrible end.
As POA was the last period, so its typically naturally horrible. :D Haha!
If i was a rich girl, nananananananananana. Heh! OH I REMEMBER. Mr Oh bully me! ): He's so cute laaaaa, LOL.
The irony of that sentence, haha. We stayed back for Math remedial; we meaning five of us, namely Younice, Jieyun, Emyi, Jasmine, Shimin and myself. And we learnt about Inequalities and i got horribly bullied by Mr Oh!
He mocked me! Haha, but it was funny. :D He's like, one of the best teachers, and he's leaving after MidYears.
Guangyang just loves to diss us, seriously. Take away our lives, idiots. Haha. Well yea, so yadda and blah.
I barely remember what happened before Math remedial anyway, meh! (: Or do i? *Smug face* HAHAHA.
Screw loose already, hahahaa. Yay! DJ Wars is on! [: And i just got some crap shit from Sherlyn, piss me off.
Oh, Lyn didnt piss me off, (: What she showed me did. I shall NOT elaborate. I shall NOT BE A KID!
%^&*()(*&^%$#$%^&*(*& AAAHHH, SH DAWN SHHHHHH! Okay, so yea. Im psyched for this weekend!
Sentosa & K! Woooweeeeee. Im so gonna be broke! Dawn needs a job, really. I wanna do tuition!
Dont laugh okay! I can speak in proper english without vulgar, grammar mistakes, vocabulary in tune. So diam!
Hahaha, that was a pure contradiction. Well, i really wanna do tuition. Any idea where? Sigh, i need cash. ):
And i wanna slap someone. Well anyway, im feeling very drained. So sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Everythings draining the life out of me, sucking the joy out of me. Life's a vampire, sucks joy. Sigh.
It sucks to feel like this, really does. It sucks to feel like everything you love is being picked and taken away slowly.
Its like someone is slowly picking at pieces of your already broken heart, taking the pieces away one by one.
Leaving you incomplete, shattered and hurting. Its that constant prick of your heart and you never know why.
But then you see the things that're fading away, you see the fear in your eyes. You hear your very own silent screams.
Its watching, wanting to do something about them leaving you so shattered, so vulnerable. But not doing anything.
Its not that i do not want to do anything, its i cannot. If i did something, if i even breathed a word..
That thread holding everything together would fray and snap. I breathe slow, count to ten, and give up.
My mind works on ways to shun this all aside. But it seems my hearts set on figuring it all out. Sigh. What now?
Everything seems okay, no one notices the stitches of my heart, the bonds of the relations slowly tearing apart.
Its snapping one.. by one.. by one.. Its tearing me apart. With all i am, i fall. Hard. All of me, gone.
Everything climbed, tiny steps.. but climbing still, to the top. My hopes rose, my faith increasing, my heart healing.
And when i found my love for life, for the very first time. I found bubbles of joy in everyday, i anticipated each day.
And with one sentence, it came crashing down, crushing me. How can i find strength to stand up again?
I just breathe slow, count to ten, sigh and give up.

I was young but i wasn't naive,

I watch helpless as everything crashes

And still i have the pain i have to carry

A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried.

I would fall asleep,

Only in hopes of dreaming that everything would be like it was before,

But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting.

They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor.Y

Wednesday, April 15, 2009 @ 9:48 PM

The greatest distance between two people is when one is beside the other yet the other doesnt know how much one cares. Why do i only learn to love when it hurts, only when its tearing apart at the seams?
Why do i only learn to loosen the reigns when theres nothing on the reigns anymore?
Why do i only know how to cry and never make a sound?
Are my bloodcurdling cries of pain not affecting your heart? Are my screams silent?
Is my pain worth.

@ 6:59 PM

3e5's very own, Jonathan Khoh Wei Chong.

"Jonathan found a laptop left behind by a customer in Cafe Gelare at Plaza Singapura,

He was not tempted to keep it for himself and displayed integrity by returning the laptop to its rightful owner."

Hey world! Haha, i love the start to my post! Oh and i edited the pictures, the school aint so classy with such certs. :/

Hahahaha, it was said to be a Macbook! Wow, Jonathan! HAHA. It was a funny assembly, today.

And this morning was really warm that i perspired like a water tap, gosh. *Note to self: I think i need to learn to appreciate myself.

Okay, so today was quite a fun and chill day. Nothing much to talk about today, except Binhui's the highlight, HAHA.

We survived Diana Koh's talk by laughing at crap in the Biology textbook, and she said something damn cheesy.

Me: Binhui, you're the soil. AHAHAHA.

Binhui: If im the soil, you're the plant so you cant live without me.

Corny, much? And we found someone that looks alot like Lester in the Biology textbook, REALLY DOES.

Basically, first few periods, excluding Cheena which is boring everyday, were munching and crapping. :D

Mr Oh is a fabulous teacher, and i do understand Math FYI. And Sherlyn is a man! HAHA. She is, really.

We were munching on chips and candy-ing lollipops. Mr Oh made fun of me, ): And Sherlyn, so we're even! Ha.

Er, Geography was me wanting to sleep and Sherlyn waking me up constantly. Oh, Cheena with Sharmeel's cool!

Assembly, like i said, was fun and cool! HAHA. People need to learn to pronounciate, seriously. HAHA.

Yes, so i agree today is a better day. And then went off to the Eight with Brended, meh. (: Eight's boring! Hm.

Friday's Commendation Day, rubbish. And yadda, and blah and so on and so forth. Heh.

I wanna migrate! Los Angeles, here i come! Singapore's really very very boring! So fake, so fake.

What they dont have, they built, and they build it so much so that its world famous. Nincompoops, much?

Like, they dont have bays, they build Marina Bay. No actual bungee jumping, G-Max. River? Singapore River.

Water theme parks? Wild wild wet. Hill? Bukit Timah Hill. Brands? Paragon. Dam? Yishun Dam.

Lame, much? My gosh, Singapore is such a screwed up place. Even the people. They're screwed too. (:

Like middle-aged aunties suffering from menopause and treating Gen Y teenagers like nonentites, kiss mah arse.

'Kiasu' til they're so overboard they dont even realize it. C'mon lah, its the 21st century, grow up for petes sake.

No courtesy, no manners. Even foreigners. No respect, no self-dignity is it?! The only people who are humane?

Caucasians. They're well brought up with perfect manners and pleasant looks on their faces and dont tsk for nuts.

Oh, long long post. Meh. ): Okay, *note to self: be yourself!, American Idol's Adam Lambert; Mine mine mine!

He's so awesome, so dope, so fly so whatever good and positive word you can think of! FLYYYYYY.

Okay, to keep you from tearing due to boredom like i did, faux-ly, today. Bye people! Byebyebyebyebyebye.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathe,

Watch you smile while you're sleeping while you're far away dreaming.

I could spend my life in this sweet surrender, i could stay lost in this moment forever.

Every moment spent with you is a moment i treasure.

Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating.

And im wondering what you're dreaming, wondering if its me you're seeing.

Then i kiss your eyes, and thank God we're together.

I just want to stay in this moment with you, forever and ever.

I just want to hold you close, feel your heart so close to mine.Y

Tuesday, April 14, 2009 @ 9:11 PM

Doesnt this just look delish? ;D You so want to eat it.

@ 8:34 PM

They always say tomorrow will be a better day, thats a lie. For today anyway. IRRITATED.
My dumbsillyannoyingstupidscrewedup phone isnt functioning as it is supposed to be, PFFT.
The horrible Commendation Day rehearsal was a pure waste of my time and it was hell, really.
It was freaking hot, freaking boring, freaking lame, freaking annoying. Yes, it was freaking freak.
Class was pretty boring, dance people were all gone & XuJieyun didnt come today,
I learnt what guys talk about when they're together. DOTA & FOC ( Fight of characters)
How boring. Seriously, what they talk about is really truly boring. I think girls talk is so much cooler!
And since i got my G.P Award & Jonathan Khoh got jealous and cut it up, you know what? I dont want it.
And blame it on the very people who want me to get it, or in my case, do not care anyway, right Mom&Dad?
I think i have the least supportive parents of all. They have no idea how glad i am i got that freaking award.
It means so much to be but simply a nonentity to them, so screw them screw the award. They dont wanna be there,
FINE. Dont. I dont give a shit. I have no idea why i try so hard to please them when they cant be bothered.
When i fail, they're not happy. When i get an award, they dont give no shit. They will never read this,
So whats the fooking point of ranting? Just screw them. I so dont deserve to be treated like crap. Seriously.
At least i have cool teachers, who are surprised but still are proud of me for getting that award.
Oh and they're not the people who raised me up, HAHA. Maybe i should call them my parents instead, ha.
And now my DUMBASS phone will not work. SHIT YOU, PHONE. SHIT. YOU. So annoyed, gosh.
Rant rant rant rant rant, todays a bad horrible terrible completely utterly disappointing painful day.
Kill me, seriously. Jonathan Khoh's such a bitch as well, and so is Lester. Such idiots sitting next to me.
'Least they make me laugh. But they're mean people. Very mean. They abuse and bully me, idiots. Grr.
I think everythings slowly screwing up. I need a plier or screwdriver. Unscrew all this shit.
I dont wanna feel like this, dont wanna cry everywhere I go. Dont wanna bleed like this, dont wanna hurt like this.
Why're you doing this, God? Theres a reason for everything, i believe. Im supposed to be in pain, i do not believe.
Wake up, Dawn.

Everybody's screaming

I try to make a sound but no one hears me

I'm slipping off the edge

I'm hanging by a thread

I wanna start this over again.

Monday, April 13, 2009 @ 8:33 PM

Hello-oh poopies! Im listening to 98.7FM DJWARS, so cool lah. :D I wanna be a DJ, :x
Van & Young are so dope. Haha, but why do they have American accents? Is that a must? :x
Hahaha, Aiden just told me he's friends with Des & Soo, is that some swipe at me. ): Haha.
Okay rant rant rant, go Van & Young! ♥ Haha, Muttons are soooo cu-te. :B HAHA.
Kay so, yesterdays service was pretty coolio. And the illustration of God's china shop is..
Simply mind-gripping. Shan't elaborate cause i think it would be very ironic to be holy here.
But yea, from porcelain toothpicks to a Ming dynasty vase, we've broken something in His shop.
Hm, Easter service really made me think manymany. Thats so twit, omg. Yes, it made me think deep. Very.
But truth be told, im quite happy the way my life is now. Even though at times it seems it not here nor there,
Its actually quite there. :D I've found someone to love, i've found people to love, i've found love. See? Haha.
Well, ( God, Van & Young! Go go go! ) Okay, random. But yea, i've got my friends, good friends, close friends.

I've got my Good Progress Award, surprising much but yes, i got it for my Sec2 End year results.
Jealous, much? [: But yea, im so proud of myself, really. Its the first time in my whole short life, finally i can breathe.
Basically, this is the highlight of my day. :D Haha, its an interesting conversation! No boredom intended.
Me: Hello? *Whispers to Jieyun, who the hell is this?!*
Person: Hello, is this Suwanie?
Me: Ya? *I mean like, you're calling my handphone right.*
Person: Its Ms Aljunied here, are you still in school?
Me: *Say what?!* Oh oh oh, hello. No.
Ms Aljunied: Oh. I just wanted to inform you that you've gotten the Good Progress Award, so you need to be
present at the Commendation Day to receive your award and I wanted to pass you a letter for your parents.
Me: OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS? I mean, oh okay.
Ms Aljunied: Yes. So i will pass it to you tomorrow, remind me okay?
Me: Ya, okay. Thank you, bye. *Omfriggingosh*
ITS SERIOUSLY DAMN SHOCKING and i was shrieking, hahahahaha. So it was like, seriously omgomg.
And really not happy about having to attend Commendation Day cause its f-r-iggin boring. No joke.
But whateverrrrrrrr! Things like this just happen to me out of random, hahaha! Yes, today is a Dawn-ish day. :D
Haha, other funnycrazylamestupidretardedsillynonsensicalrandom things happened today! Shan't describe.
Yea, and the DM needs to have his eyes fixed. ): Okay, with that aside, hahaa, today was a fun day. [:
And i need a haircut. :/ And im bored. And i wanna go shopping, but i have one Yusof dollar. Poo you. Pfft.
Kay, i shall stop here. Last but surely not the least, GO VAN & YOUNG! ♥

The marks of your lips stained on my broken heart.

Im bearing the scars of my love.

Saturday, April 11, 2009 @ 10:07 PM

OHMYFRIGGINGAWD, WATER ON MARS! I DISCOVERED IT! ;D
Im so lame. I like i like, (: Zhixin just called me sensible, my gosh! LOL. Thats a joke. [:
I cant remember what i did yesterday, so i wont blog. OH I REMEMBER! Haha.
I was supposed to go Sentosa but i was burnt, why? I dont know. :x So i didnt go.
Then i met Qiyin, went Admiralty blew down a piggy's house, then went Admiral Bar.
And spilled Tiger all over myself, NOT MY TIGER, just to clarify. [: Yeap, so reached home at one plusxzxz.
Today, Central had Eggcite, & i went. Amazing, i know. Not. Okay so it was at West Coast Clementi West.
I found that out from a nice guy, my arse, called Sebas, which is a yxk! HAHA, yao xiu kia. :x Sounds so lian-ish.
But anyway, he directed me a lil here & a lil there, am grateful, THANKYOU CAT WITH NO BALLS! :B
So yea, played alot of gross games & it was BURNING HOT. That explains my burnt self now. :D
Im red in the face, arms, legs. Its called sunburnt & a sexy tan you noobies. Haha, im being arrogant. :x
No! I cant be arrogant! Im not Chewmin. Pfft, im being mean. Shut up, Dawn. Okay so anyway, it was fun.
Although i had to use my foot to put a sponge which had been in eggyolk like, 4 times and put in it the eggyolk.
And try to carry it across a field. And it was egg-mania, seriously. Haha. It was good fun with good friends. :D
We then headed to Clementi, supposedly, but ended up at West Mall. And amazingly, my mum works there.
So yea, we ate there.. chilled abit, talked about movies. Walked around a little and stuffs, yea, good times.
And im seriously burnt, owch. ): Okay, continue-ing. Then came onto MSN & Sherlyn started ranting.
About a certain girl who has no originality and no brains to learn how to reflect on her own attitude.
And yes, it got me pissed. But im afraid of lians, ): AHAHAHAHA! Okay, and Joyce called me gek kiang, -.-
Well, all in all, todays a great day. Made fun of people, got made fun of, a little of everything.
Everything sweet, sugary and nice. Like Powderpuff Girls, haha, powderpuff, suckers. :x They're cool! :D
So yea, now i've got a cool tan! Which i love! And a lobster red face, which i.. lovehatelikedislikeheartnotblah!
Tomorrows Easter service & i shall grace Suntec City with my presence and create havoc with my craziness. :D
Which i believe i will be very crazy. Sometimes, craziness really eases the pain. :D Its a joy to be crazy.
You dont think so much. And its nice to love yourself, you dont hate yourself so much. [:
And my exams are coming, 29th, on the 21st shall be my very last chilloh day, will be going for the B&J's thing.
I need to learn self-discipline. I need to be extremely self-disciplined. I dont want a boyfriend, iwantamanfriend! :/
HAHA, such an ass. Okay, goodbye people. Love, me. (:

How many times can I break till I shatter?

Over the line can't define what I'm after ,

I always turn the car around

All that I feel is the realness I'm faking,

Taking my time but it's time that I'm wasting,

Always turn the car around.

Thursday, April 9, 2009 @ 7:35 PM

I knew it! I will post again, after such a short period time! I think im blogger crazy, :/
I was just thinking of some random stuff. Like relationships, okay not random, haha!
Isnt it just cruel how people treat love like a game? Its cruel how people judge others, too.
And if two people were 'meant to be', but because one of them judged the other a bad way,
They might never end up together. Or maybe one judged before getting to know the other better.
Sigh, its so horrible. Seeing people i know, getting hurt, falling for those who dont love them.
Eh seriously, there's a glitch in love! Why do people always fall for those who dont love them! Haha, major glitch.
And why do people always not know how to cherish those that love them the most. Some people get kicked about like a soccer ball, thrown around like a basketball, some get broken and shatter like glass and mirrors.
Cant things be simple? Why does the human brain and heart have to make things so complicated?
Why do people have to judge others from their screwed up brains when the person might'nt be not at all like that! Sometimes, i really think people should just take a deep, long breath and think properly, deeply and sanely.
People are really rash, impulsive and think with their asses. Wonder what your minds are for,
Wonder what your experiences and heart is for. Sometimes, we have to realize that we're not the only one alive.
That we're not the only one with feelings and wants. Sometimes, we have to stop taking things for granted.
Especially people. And i've learnt that the hard way. People matter most, how could you live alone, really.
If the people around you, you take for granted, one day when they leave you, whats left of you?
When the person who loves you so much chooses to leave you, who's gonna love you?
Life's a major killjoy sometimes. Taking away the things you love most, taking away all you love at a go.
What would you do if something you loved was taken away from you?

I have a swollen eye! It hurts like i got punched in my iris! Ouch, hurts. ):

@ 6:39 PM

My first two collages, yes there are very screwed up. Shut up about it. Many pictures cant be seen properly, shut up!
Haha, so basically, it has some fun pictures and mostly pictures of the people & days that made my life. :D
Haha, if you see your face, congrats! I dont care if its unglam, & some pictures i never knew i had! :D Haha!
Well yeaaaaaaaa, :D I kinda like it! Haha, though Marcus's face keeps appearing, ah! :x Hahaha! Okay,
Today was fun! Very very fun. :D Yea, thats my day. Too lazy and not bothered to describe. :D Haha.
Oh i found another way to do a collage! But i shant do it. Until i hit my goal. :D Which is..
To take an amazing picture with the people i treasure most! :D Then after that i'll make the beautiful collage!
Omg, Simon Cowell just eliminated Scott Macintyre. ): Anoop Desai should be elimated! NOT SCOTT!
Its so sad seeing them live. ): Liew, stupid Anoop. Pfft. Yeaa! Kay, im gonna go busy myself.
Probably will come back here and type random/meaningful crap later! Byebyebyebyebyebyebyebyebyebyebye.

How many times can i break til i shatter?

Wednesday, April 8, 2009 @ 8:41 PM

Remember those walls i built? Well baby, they're tumbling down and they didnt even put up a fight.
They didnt even make a sound. I found a way to let you in, but i never really had a doubt standing in the light of your halo.
I got my angel now. It's like i've been awakened, every rule i had you're breaking, its the risk that im taking,
I aint never gonna shut you out. Everywhere im looking now, im surrounded by your embrace.
Baby, i can see your halo, you know you're my saving grace. You're everything i need and more,
Its written all over your face. Baby i can feel your halo, pray that it wont fade away. I can feel your halo.
Hit me like a ray of sun, burning through my darkest night. You're the only one that i want, think im addicted to your light.
I swore i'd never fall again, but this dont even feel like falling. Gravity cant forget, to pull me back to the ground again.

@ 6:39 PM

She says i look damn malay, really?! :/

Mango&Durian Shaved Ice, yumyumyum! T'was really nice.

Isnt he cute! LOL. Not.

Look alike right! :D :D :D

First, idk what im doing. Second, Jieyun looks damn funny!

Shot by Marcus, self-proclaimed photographer.

'Im health conscious!' says Marcus. ( Thats really what he said.)

-Showing off pits- LOL. Binhui was imitating Marcus.

'Wahlau! I play with pillow also get taken!' JonathanKhoh.

'Look like me right!' Says Binhui.

Jieyun: I dont want chicken! Binhui: Why the chicken mouth so big?! Marcus: Na na na!

Grandma Chicken. :x

'Hmm, i wonder if the coke is drink-able.'

Haha yeap, basically, that was my few weeks ago & my yesterday. (: Shall post about yesterday. (: AND!

ADAM LAMBERT JUST GOT A STANDING OVATION FROM SIMON COWELL! Go Adam! ♥

Well, yes. Continue, hahahaha. So we, Marcus JonathanKhoh Lester ShawLeong Binhui Jieyun Emyi,

Met to celebrate Jieyun&Emyi's birthday. We watched Unborn, I truly deeply extremely regret. Haha. Really.

Im damn afraid now, so shut up! :/ Well, i wasnt watching half the time, i was screaming at stupid things.

Laughed at the upside down head dog though, its not bad if you like paying to scare yourself so go for it! :/

And Jonathan was scared! Ahahahahaha! -Covers eyes- 'Shit, its coming its coming.' HAHAHAHA.

Okay, i shouldnt be laughing at him. Sh, Dawn. (: So after that, we headed to Mind Cafe. (: A first for me.

It was a pretty cool place, its good overall. (: Good service, good seating, good temperature, good blah.

I only didnt like the lighting. But thats redundant. So yea, haha. I found out about this game called Anti-Monopoly.

HAHA. Retarded right! Yea, basically its force your opponent to bankruptcy! But we played Snorta!

Basically it has to do with animal noises and remember each others animal noise, the exact same way the do it.

Imagine the hilarity of it all! It must've been a joke to watch. Especially watching Lester go meow meow! :/

Because you're supposed to voice the sound of the person which opened the matching card with you, basically.

So JonathanKhoh & Lester's cards matched, they started pointing at each other, went OHOHOHOHOH!

And Khoh went 'Meow meow meow!!!!!!' Which was Lester's animal sound, & Lester followed. Hilarious.

And alot of other retarded stuff! Which would be too lengthy to detail anyway, but it was very very funny. :D

Emyi had to do a forfeit, we wanted her to kiss a guy at the table! Or ask a stranger, a guy, for his number!

But in the end, we stuck with standing up, shouting 'Hey! Touch my body! Whoa!' Haha! She did it thrice.

And we made her go to the waiter, cause Jonathan wanted to change his lime juice to coke, so we wanted her to say.

'Can i have a cock please?' Omg, it was darned sick. :/ And alot of crazy stuff happened. :D

Like when i threw the frog at Marcus, it went for a swim under the couch and never came back. ):

And new nicknames for many other people. :D Right, Grandma Chicken? Haha, it was a jolly fun time!

Lets do it again someday! So after that, we headed off to play pool at Parklane. Mankit came over.

You should see how noob we looked, seriously noob. So lets skip the horrifying details and move on. :D

Jonathan, Lester & Binhui left. OH YAH! Marcus agreed to take a picture with Binhui but not Jieyun! Ahaha!

Loser, Jieyun. :/ So anyway, after they left, we headed to Plaza sing for shaved ice. It was goo-oooood. :D

And Marcus called the fishes in the fish tanks sashimi. -.- Such a retard, aye. And that was about it. :D

It was a unglam, fun and memorable day. :D Oh and we payed 5 dollars for a cup of coke. ): Losers, right!

Okay yea anyway, today was fine. :D Had a good day with Lyn, aye? :D Girl talk, and she got kinky on me!

Such a bee-tch! She got so kinky on Joyce as well! And Joyce tried to make me kinky cause she was kinky.

Such a loser, she failed. Haha, and i hid her wallet, balanced it on my foot, and she didnt know. Haha!

Yeaa, Sara is a big bundle of joy to be around as well. :D Then me & Jieyun went to goof off at J8. :D

Oh yes, Happy Birthday Yong Mingquan! Dont blame me for not being there for your partay!

I wasnt invited. ): But i hope you still remember me kk! I dont think you do though. ): This kinda friend, tsk.

Haha, yea yea yea. I need Yusofs, wondering how to get them. Cant even work, dumbass school.

Exams are from 29 April to 14 May, what the heck right, seriously. But i really want to do well, help me? D:

I must learn to be hardworking like Jonathan Khoh! Not. Okay, Good Friday outing guys! I want i want! :D

And, 2009 is coming along perfectly perfect. Valleys in life are inevitable, just gotta take them in stride.

Thank you Lyn, Joyce, Qiyin, Isaac, Adha, Donal, Alex, Sara, Sharmeel, Jeremiah, Lihern and Phyllis.

Small parts played, big parts played, you still played a part. You cared for me. Thank you. (:

Why do we push away the guys that make us smile, but fight so hard for those that make us cry? - Bin's blog.

Just a little food for thought. :D I think many people will agree on this, right ladies? :D

All the single ladies all the single ladies! OHOHOH. Kiss me through the phone, kiss me through the phone! ♥

Well i hoped that since we're here anyway

We could end up saying things we've always needed to say

So we could end up stringing

Now the story's played out like this

Just like a paperback novel

Lets rewrite an ending that fits instead of a hollywood horror.